


Want To See You Awake

by silentfleur



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: -Ish, Alternate Universe, Angst and Smut, Eventual Happy Ending, F/M, Fuck TROS, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Minor Character Death, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rey Nobody, Slow Burn, This is my therapy, ben is four, divergent inspired au, finn is caleb, finn is my baby, fuck allegiant, hardass-ish ben, heart eye rey, i would never put ugly ass caleb's arc on him, maz adopted them, only not, rey is tris, saga ends at TLJ, shit was awful, shit was even worse, siblings finn and rey, we starting fresh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-20
Updated: 2020-08-20
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:42:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26005126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silentfleur/pseuds/silentfleur
Summary: Aurelia Johnson lives in a society divided by five factions created to maintain peace and order. She lives in Abnegation with her adoptive mother, Maz, and her brother Finn.At 20 years old, she must now choose her faction.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 4
Kudos: 3
Collections: Let's Go to the Movies - Reylo Readers & Writers Prompt Exchange





	Want To See You Awake

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



> Hello! I'm Moon. This is my first fic. If you have any questions/concerns/etc., you can find me on twitter @complexvillain!
> 
> Please read all the tags!
> 
> Rey's name at the start of this fic is Aurelia Johnson. I pronounce it oh-REY-lee-ya, hence why I chose it. It's mostly used in the first chapter. She will go by Rey for the rest of the fic with only the occasional mention of it throughout.
> 
> Special thank you to starlight_suns for this prompt! 
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

_Over one hundred years ago, there was a terrible war that ravaged the country._

_The survivors managed to salvage the city of Chicago and make it a safe haven. These survivors, now known as the Founders, built a wall to wrap around the city’s borders to protect the last trace of this nation's humanity._

_Once safe, they designed a new system of society; one that divides its citizens into five different groups, or factions, that each represents a different virtue._

_Every year, those becoming twenty years of age must choose their faction._

**

Living in Abnegation does not come easy for Aurelia. It never had. Ever since they were adopted by Maz, Finn often scolds her about fitting in. Aurelia tried to explain that she does not share his instincts to help people.

"It's not about instinct. It's about doing what you're told," Finn has said.

However he wants to look at it, it simply never kicked in for her. She thinks it worries him and she can't blame him. The idea of returning to the factionless is unfathomable. And as loving as Maz is, she knows it was an unpopular decision to allow their adoption in the first place.

It kept her from truly settling in.

Aurelia is walking slower than usual, trying to drag out the seconds until her test. Finn, already annoyed with her lack of timeliness, moves on without her. At least he spared her a disapproving look.

She's the last in a line of timid looking twenty-year-olds in variations of gray; a plain color meant to have them blend in with the background. That's Abnegation. Always selfless.

Is she selfless?

To see each of the young faction members all lined up, side by side makes those nagging questions that linger in the back of her mind float to the surface.

Is she smart like those who wear the striking blue of Erudite? Is she kind like those who wear the warm sunlike colors of Amity? Is she honest like those who wear the black and white contrast of Candor?

_If this system works, truly works, for everyone, why do I feel like I belong in each one and none at all?_

She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath, willing the thoughts away with the tensing of her jaw.

There was another reason she was last in line. It allowed her to turn around, without anyone noticing, and watch the Dauntless ride in.

_Hellions_ , Maz would say with disgust despite the smile buried somewhere amongst her many visible years. It's a curious combination but Aurelia wasn't allowed to ask her about it. Curiosity, for personal gain, was against Abnegation culture.

The figures, dressed in dark, moody colors were tense with built-up energy as they hung off the side of the train. They each leap, some landing on their feet and moving into an immediate sprint; others tumbling before joining them. But they all had the same wild look.

It made Aurelia envious. She couldn't deny that. Not in her own mind, at least. It was the only selfish thing in her life she indulged in.

_Am I brave_? she asked herself.

She didn't know.

The line was moving up and each person was completing their test. No one looked particularly nervous to go in and no one looked particularly traumatized coming out.

So, why did Aurelia feel like what little content exists in her stomach was going to be splayed out in front of her, all over this poor girl's gray cardigan?

The line moves on until Aurelia is sitting in a chair outside waiting for Cardigan Girl to be done with her test. She hopes she takes, at least, three days in there.

Aurelia starts to imagine the girl unwittingly misunderstanding each question, the tester— maybe someone from Amity— kindly explaining each and every one, over and over again. Until this Abnegation girl realizes her stupidity is impeding on Amity tester's time or until Amity tester realizes it is kinder to just let her through with the same Abnegation result rather than let her finish it.

Or however, it worked.

No one knows until you go through it. And even then no one speaks of the actual test itself. At least, no one in Abnegation does. Since asking is considered personal gain— it will not change the outcome for another person— she never has. No matter how many times the question has been on the tip of her tongue while she's washing dishes next to Maz or while Maz cuts her hair.

Aurelia gets so lost in her daydream, it regrettably makes the time pass quicker.

Cardigan Girl, a mousy-looking person who always looks down, comes out of the room and leaves just as unperturbed as she went in.

Aurelia tries to let it calm her.

It doesn't.

The open door means it's her turn. She knows that. Yet, her knuckles whiten in her own grip until she takes a deep breath and walks into the room.

A woman is in the center of the room, next to a chair. A big metal seat that looks eerily similar to what Aurelia refers to as the torture contraption found in an Abnegation dentist office. She briefly wonders if it's the same one. It's attached to a bunch of machines and screens, all with information Erudite founded.

Not that this woman is Erudite. No. Not with her lavender hair, nor with her metallic circular accessory perched upon the crown of her head. The long charcoal draping of her wraps and her septum piercing makes it quite clear: she is Dauntless.

"Sit," is all the woman says. Aurelia does. "I'm Holdo. I'll be administrating your test."

Aurelia doesn't bother introducing herself. They'll know who she is already. She tries to keep her eyes forward but the movement next to her has her peering over. In the back of Holdo''s wraps is a large keyhole cutout and on her bare pale skin is a large tattoo of black wings.

"What do they mean?" Aurelia asks, nerves making the words spill through her carefully built filter.

Holdo looks up at her and sees her pointing towards her back.

"They're the wings of a raven. Some myths say the raven is the sun. I needed it to get me through the nights." She doesn't look Aurelia in the eye. And Aurelia doesn't beckon it.

She hands Aurelia a vile of blue liquid.

"Drink that," she says.

"What is it?" Aurelia's free hand tightens around her armrest.

"It's your test. You will be put through a simulation that will provide you with a series of choices. Your choices will help determine which faction you belong in." She says calmly and well-rehearsed. "Bottoms up."

Aurelia looks down at the liquid, takes a deep breath, pours it down her throat, and closes her eyes.

*

When she opens them, she finds herself in a dark cave. It's wet, humid, isolated; unlike any place she has ever been.

Aurelia looks all around until some sort of movement catches her eye. She walks closer to it, noticing it again. As she steps towards the movement, she begins to realize she is seeing her own reflection in the wall of the cave.

The cave wall is glass-like; cracked, imperfect, and dark but it's clear enough that she can see herself.

Only her reflection suggests there is someone behind her. She whips around, sees that she is surrounded by multiples of herself, all lined up and facing her. It's overwhelming, her heart thumping loudly in her chest. She turns back around and squeezes her eyes shut.

Aurelia has never seen her full body before; never looked at her own face this long. Abnegation rejects vanity.

But there is a part of Aurelia that is curious, that _wants_ to look. So, she slowly opens her eyes.

She sees a thin young woman in front of her, tall with dull, brown hair. Her jaw is definitive, her eyes more green than not; a decorative splattering of freckles falls across her face. She feels plain, ordinary. Perfect for Abnegation.

Her reflection begins to move without Aurelia having moved an inch. She becomes even more still.

"Choose," she hears her own voice say and when Aurelia looks down she sees a knife and a slab of raw meat on a table.

"Why?" Aurelia asks. Talking to herself is nothing new, at least.

"Choose." Other Aurelia says again. Aurelia's eyebrows furrow.

"No. Tell me why first," Other Aurelia disappears and so do the options.

Aurelia is confused.

Then, she hears the growling of a dog.

She turns around slowly and is met with the black eyes and slick teeth of a dog snarling at her; the posture that of an animal ready to pounce.

It makes Aurelia's pulse quicken, a singeing of fear tingling down her spine.

_Ah_ , now she understands the purpose of the knife and meat but it is too late.

She makes sure not to look it in its eyes, knowing that's a sign of aggression. She also knows there is no way to run. The dog will be much faster than her. Fighting it also isn't an option. She doesn't know how and she's not very strong.

_This is a test,_ her brain reminds her. _None of this is real._ _You're sitting on a dental chair right now._

Something in her calms. She does the only thing she can think of and slowly falls to her knees with her eyes shut. 

She's expecting something to happen. Maybe she'll wake up in her chair. Maybe she has to feel the excruciating pain of being torn apart by a wild animal.

But no, neither come to pass. 

Instead, she hears low whimpering and finds the dog has laid down next to her, it's long wet nose nudging her open palm.

She lets out a shaky breath, smiling widely to herself as she pets the dog.

"He's cute!" A young voice cuts through from behind her. Aurelia whips her head around and sees a small boy pointing at the dog nuzzling her lap.

Only now the dog is snarling again. Not at her this time but at the child. Aurelia watches the boy's eyes fall from bright interest to widened fear. She watches his feet stumble as he tries to run away.

The dog is predictably quick, chasing the boy with long intense strides, and Aurelia doesn't even _think_. Every instinct in her body tells her to run after it, to throw her entire body on the animal. So that is exactly what she does. 

The fur and strained muscle of the dog is all she can feel as she grips her arms around it.

It feels so utterly real that she tucks her face into the fur of it's back as braces for a gnarly fall against the bleak rocks.

Except it never comes.

She untucks her head and watches the world distort, a weird disjointed effect, as they are falling _through_ the rocks.

Aurelia jolts awake.

*

Holdo's blue eyes are looking at her in alarm.

"What were my results?" Aurelia asks immediately, despite being afraid of the answer.

"Listen to me, Aurelia. You're going to go home and say the serum made you sick."

"What?" She asks, blindsided.

"Go home," Holdo repeats, typing furiously into the metal machine.

"No. Tell me about my results." She stands up from the chair. "We're supposed to _trust_ the test." Aurelia hears the accusatory edge creep into her own voice. Heard it like it was a sin she committed in Abnegation.

Holdo faces her. "The test didn't work on you." Aurelia feels her world dip.

"Are yo— you saying I'm going to be factionle—" Aurelia has never felt this close to fainting in her life.

"No, no," she grips her arms. "Aurelia, your result was Abnegation—"

Aurelia has the fleeting idea of screaming but it passes as Holdo keeps speaking.

"—and Erudite. And Dauntless." Aurelia feels her breath catch in her throat. 

"That's impossible," she says, finally exhaling, tears stinging her eyes.

"No, not impossible. Only extremely rare," Holdo says, gently.

Aurelia can't feel her own fingers. Holdo shifts even closer to her. "You _cannot_ repeat any of what I'm telling you to anyone. Not your family. Not your loved ones. You must never utter these results to anyone. Not even to those you trust." Aurelia nods— not wanting to question it. This bit of information steadies her. She didn't want to share her results with anyone anyway— and everyone knew better than to ask.

"You're what they call divergent," Holdo says.

Aurelia suddenly and intensely wished she were Cardigan Girl. Or Finn. Or even this woman with the metal through her nose. It was a sort of freedom to fit in somewhere, she would imagine, to belong. Even if she had always known, somewhere deep inside, that was never going to be her.

"Now, leave. I've entered Abnegation manually as your result. Of course, you always have a right to choose but you must be smart." She looks at her very seriously. "Or they'll find you."

It was vague, ominous, and all she'll get as she's shoved from the testing room.

**

She took the long way home despite the influx of Factionless that lined the streets. They were dressed in scraps of clothing, some made by Abnegation, some remnants of the factions they grew up in.

Aurelia imagines it must be a hard life as an adult, cut off from society, no way to provide for yourself or contribute.

It makes her think of her own birth parents. Of how miserable they were. Complete drunks who died, together at least, by jumping in front of a train.

She tightens her fists.

_They traded me for the drinking money necessary to buy enough alcohol to embolden them to die that way._

It's a dark truth that plagues Aurelia's nightmares.

When she gets home, she notices Finn right away. Finn with his collection of Abnegation-approved books that pile against his walls. Finn, who gets a new set of clothes from Maz every week because he legitimately gives the shirt off his back to someone who needs it.

Finn, who was meant to be here.

She joins him in prepping for dinner.

The light from the window helps her slice the ginger roots and also keeps her distracted from her heavy thoughts.

Finn moves next to her to dice some celery. He's fidgety, she can tell in her peripheral vision. She glances at him. He's already looking at her.

"Did you finish your test?" He asks. Aurelia looks back down at the ginger in her hand.

"Yes," she says. And adds nothing else. Finn, uncharacteristically restless, drops a piece of chopped celery.

"What was your result?" He asks. Aurelia looks at him, surprised he's bold enough to ask her that.

"What was yours?" She challenges. He looks at her for a moment. And then smiles, nudging her with his shoulder. And Aurelia feels like she can breathe again.

**

"The choosing ceremony is very important for Abnegation tomorrow. It's no secret Erudite is looking for ways to undermine us." Maz says, calmly eating her food.

Aurelia moves her peas around with her fork.

Erudite believes that by being most intelligent, they should be entrusted to run the government. That only _they_ can make the most logical decisions.

Aurelia thinks they just want control and power.

She, however, knows what Maz is specifically referring to. Erudite has been trying to undermine Abnegation by spreading lies. They must be. They say Abnegation steals food from the needy to keep for themselves. Or when someone from Abnegation defects, they claim it's because of abuse at the hands of their families.

It drove Han Solo to the breaking point. The death of his wife first, then the defection of his son and all those horrible rumors in-between. He's been important to Abnegation leadership so, therefore, he's protected as much as he can be considering how many rules he breaks.

Aurelia always felt sorry for him.

Finn, not as much. Even if he does travel clear across the grounds to drop groceries off or the occasional heaping of aspirin on his front doorstep.

But Aurelia will never forget his vote for her to stay here. The deciding vote. How could she?

The leader of Abnegation, a man named Luke, voted _against_ her staying here. As well as two other people. But Maz, Han, Leia (Han's wife), and Old Man Ackbar said she could stay.

Finn always has to remind her not to stare unkindly at Luke.

Again, easy for him to say. Luke voted _yes_ for him.

As much as she dislikes Luke, the rumors of mistreatment towards children seem far-fetched. It's against Abnegation instinct to be cruel. They're the faction that feeds and clothes the factionless. They're selfless to the point of self-erasure. Whatever her beef with Luke, or her silent gratitude towards the rest, has little to do with Erudite's determination to take leadership of their government.

That's what she tells herself at least.

"Don't take too long on dishes tonight. You'll both need your rest for the ceremony tomorrow." Before Maz walks away, she pauses, a serious look upon her face.

"I love you both. You're very dear to me," she says. Finn and Aurelia stand there in surprise. Maz pulls Finn close and hugs him tight.

Touching is only for married couples in Abnegation. Even then, it's limited to hands and private reproduction. She can see Finn's eyes widen and then water as he receives this loving touch.

Then Maz turns to her, pulls her close, and Aurelia holds her tight. _It feels wonderful to be held as a child should_ , she thinks. It brings about the tears that spill over onto her face. She wipes them before Maz can see.

Maz walks out, one last loving look and this— this is the worst part of the decision she is forced to make tomorrow. If Aurelia chooses a different faction, she can never come back. She'll lose Maz. She'll lose Finn. She'll lose all she's ever known.

"Aurelia," Finn calls. She doesn't turn around right away, wiping her teardrops again.

"Tomorrow, when you choose, you have to think of Maz." Aurelia nods. She knows they'll call her abusive. They'll slander her in the papers.

_How could a lost soul, someone she saved, commit such betrayal? What causes Abnegation children to flee?_

Aurelia looks down, feeling her chest sink.

"But you also have to think of yourself," he adds, a tear falling from his face. She does not know what to make of it but she is grateful he said it. She pulls him into a hug before he could protest.

He doesn't. He just holds her and Aurelia briefly hates Abnegation. Hates their rules that are devoid of this. Thinks she could've been hugging Maz and Finn every single day of her life here.

But, it passes. Abnegation brought her Maz. Gave her a home. Saved her life. Saved Finn's life. It's the only home she's known.

She has no idea what she is going to do tomorrow.

**

The Choosing Ceremony is a private event only for the leaders of the factions, the twenty-year-olds from each faction making their choice, and their families.

Aurelia has never been in this room. Has never seen each of the bowls that represent the distinct factions. Abnegation with its gray stones. Hot coals for Dauntless while Erudite's contains pure water. Amity's is filled with the very dirt of the Earth and Candors with broken glass.

Each of the faction leaders takes turns on who guides the ceremony. This year is Luke’s turn.

He leads a long speech. Aurelia barely listens, catching only the end of it.

“... When you leave this room, you will no longer be dependents but full-fledged members of our society.” He says before chanting, “Faction before blood.”

One of these bowls, that Luke stands behind now, will contain two drops of Aurelia's blood, a symbol of her oath to them. An oath that is supposed to run deeper than her love for Finn or Maz.

_Faction before blood_ is the motto she will be forced to live by.

Aurelia thinks of her test results; Abnegation, Dauntless, and Erudite. She ruled out Erudite before Holdo could even finish saying it. Their leader, Mortimer Snoke, is currently in the front row wearing a long blue coat.

He is the most grotesque man she has ever seen and the spreader of lies about their community. He wanted power, anyone could see that, even if it's hidden behind an intelligent, well-articulated demeanor.

Maz loathed him. Aurelia, too. Finn never spoke badly about anyone.

"A leader is not their faction," is all he would say before taking another bite of his food.

Still, Erudite was off the table. So were Candor and Amity. But that was a given. It really came down to Abnegation or Dauntless.

She'll either be selfless and stay at Abnegation for Maz, for Finn, who's sure to pick it. Or she'll be brave and choose Dauntless.

Whichever she feels most strongly when they call her name will lead her to make her choice.

**

The ceremony is long and most people stay with their faction anyway. Occasionally, people will transfer and it always leads to applause from the chosen faction and a gasp of horror from the one left behind. The only thing loud enough to cut through it are the sobs from their families.

At least, Aurelia didn't have to worry about that. Maz never cried. Ever. She only saw Finn tear up for the first time yesterday.

They sort the adults making their choice by faction and then by time of birth. With this order and with the unknown status of their births, Finn and Aurelia will be the very last ones.

She wishes they were first. She wishes it could already be done. She can't handle this much longer.

Finally, after what has felt like hours, it is Abnegation's turn.

"Finn Johnson," Luke says directly into the microphone.

It's been a long time since she's heard Finn's full name. He doesn't always use it. It was a name they chose for themselves when they were children on the factionless streets.

Finn holds Aurelia's hand, squeezes it very tight. He kisses Maz on the top of her head. It makes Aurelia sit up straighter.

He goes to the bowls, a very confident line in his shoulders. Luke smiles at him, hands him the knife.

He looks back at her one more time. And Aurelia is filled with pride for him. He's grown up to be such an incredible man. Handsome, too. All the girls in school used to think so. Even though he's Abnegation where he was supposed to blend in with the background, he never could.

She smiles at him. He nods.

And then he slices his hand and drops his blood in the Erudite water.

*

Aurelia feels ringing in her ears. Abnegation is horror-stricken. An eruption of whispers travels across the group. Even Luke has a hard time containing the look on his face. Maz holds Aurelia's hand but says nothing, her lips pressed into a line.

Aurelia is in disbelief. If Finn isn't meant for this faction, Finn who completes his duties with ease, how on Earth could she be?

But Maz's hand on hers is a reminder that she is all that is left.

If she stays, she can salvage this. She can help restore Abnegation's name. At least, at first. It couldn't hurt. She would eventually take Maz's place on the council. She'd marry someone— maybe someone who'd break the rules with her a little. Maybe a transfer would. Her thoughts are scattered, near nonsensical.

"Aurelia Johnson," Luke calls her name.

She doesn't kiss Maz on the forehead like Finn. Even if she wants to. She does squeeze her hand.

Her feet take her to the bowls without her asking them to. She briefly looks at Luke whose gaze is a warning. She can feel it. It only pushes her away.

She glances back at Finn, who now sits with Erudite. A strong form in gray amongst a sea of blue. He watches her and then he nods.

It's all she needs.

She slices her hand, a pain she barely feels and hears her blood sizzle on the Dauntless coals.

*

She looks up at Luke. There might be hatred in his eyes. Or pain. Or both. She's not sure. She doesn't care.

The Dauntless holler from their seats at obtaining another transfer. Someone grabs her by the shoulders and pushes her along with their group.

She glances back at Maz. There is hurt somewhere deep in her eyes but there is also a smile hidden. _Hellions,_ she's probably thinking. And that's Aurelia now.

The ceremony ends.

It's over. She will not return to Abnegation. She will leave with Dauntless. She doesn't think about it.

The group of people in dark colors, Dauntless-born who stayed loyal to their faction, lead the way.

The second they hit the ground outside, they burst into a sprint.

Aurelia watches for a moment before realizing she can join them. That she _must_ join them.

Her feet hit the pavement as she chases after them.

She's _running._ Her lungs expanding, her chest heaving. But more importantly, the sun is on the skin of her face and hands, the wind envelops her body. It's brilliant.

She couldn't do this in Abnegation. They exercise on machines and only for thirty minutes a day. Simply for health.

This, _this_ is pure enjoyment.

Aurelia is breathless quickly but she pushes past it. Her body, unused to even this.

In the distance, she sees the dauntless figures climbing up the steel railings that hold the trains above them.

She pauses before it. Fights back the urge to grin as she knows what she's about to be able to do. She focuses, places her hand on the cool metal bar, and lifts herself up. She climbs, pulling herself up as she clamors on top of the narrow space beside the train tracks.

She's behind the transfers. Or initiates, is what they are now called. Not members yet. No, they have to prove themselves first.

She can hear the train coming, can recognize the familiar thrum of energy that runs through the dauntless-borns bodies in preparation.

She starts to feel it herself.

They take off in a run, a head start as the train is whirling ahead. It has no intention of stopping and that's just how they like it.

The dauntless-borns leap on seemingly invisible railings and handlebars, slapping something on the sides to open its doors.

The initiates follow suit. You can see the fear. They may be brave for choosing this faction but they are still human. It's terrifying to try this for the first time.

Aurelia runs, chases after the dauntless-born. Eager to leap on the train, like she's secretly and selfishly always desired.

She can see it now, the step on the side, the handrail above it. She imagines herself stepping onto it and swinging herself inside.

She jumps, her left foot narrowly catching on the step. Her hand grips the handrail, and there's a moment where she nearly slips but her determination turns her hand into a _lock_ and she throws her body inside.

She clashes into a girl wearing black and white. From Candor, she must be.

"Sorry," Aurelia says, reaching out to steady her.

"You made it!" The girl says. Aurelia looks at her confused.

"Poe bet Snap you wouldn't." She says, too honestly. This is why Aurelia didn't like Candor.

Then the girl leans in. "But I knew you would," she grins, something good-natured, and instantly Aurelia liked her. Just like that.

She looks over at Poe along with who must be Snap, both dressed in black and white, as well.

It was weird to be spoken about. To be _seen_. That was not the Abnegation way.

Although, it was strange for a member of Abnegation to transfer to Dauntless in the first place. She's never heard of it being done before.

_Someone has to have, right?_ She asks herself. _I can't be the first one._

She's not sure. She's also not sure if it matters.

The dauntless-borns are up again. The Candor girl goes to the windows and peers out.

"They're jumping!" She exclaims. Aurelia follows her to the window and sees them lunge off the train onto the flat roof of a building. There is no ground between them, no net. If you don't make it, you die.

Aurelia looks over at the Candor girl.

"Together?" She asks. The girl nods. They run as far back to the train as they can, take off in a full sprint, and _leap_.

The ground of the building is filled with gravel and jagged stones and Aurelia rolls into them on impact. Her gray sweater is torn, she's bleeding a little on her arm, but she can't suppress the smile anymore. A laugh breaks free from her. Pure _exhilaration_.

The Candor girl has also made it, not too far from where she's landed, and joins her in the raucous.

Eventually, everyone is off the train. They stand and wait, unsure of what is next.

A man dressed in all black appears from a door. His bright red hair and thick sideburns make him stand out under the heat.

"I'm Hux. I'm one of your Dauntless leaders. Thank you for your choice." His face might as well be a snarl. There are a couple more Dauntless members behind him. They do not introduce themselves.

"You have already begun the Initiation process. We seem to be off to a good start. No deaths. No factionless." The snarl worsens. "I assure you, that will change."

As if in slow motion, all of the initiates turn to look at her. _Aurelia_ , the only member of Abnegation. The _Stiff_ as she used to be called in school. No one thinks she should be here.

It kindles a fire in her belly.

"To enter Dauntless headquarters, you must jump." He motions with his hand, off the side of the building.

"Is there water down there?" A blonde girl in blue asks. An Erudite transfer.

"When you jump, you'll find out. Who will go first?"

No one raises their hand. Jumping off the edge of a building, without knowing if it's a trick or not, is not exactly an appealing offer.

But Aurelia knows they don't kill their own members. Whatever is down there, a dauntless member should be able to handle it.

Not to mention, her pride was thrumming loudly in her ears.

"I'll go," Aurelia says. They are all looking at her again. She ignores them and walks towards Hux.

"Up on the ledge," he says and steps aside.

Aurelia walks over to the ledge and peers over. There's a giant hole smashed through a single level building. It's pitch black. There's no way to know what she's falling into.

She takes her ripped cardigan off, only to hear catcalls come from behind her. The straps of her dress are thick on her shoulders but they expose the rest of her arms. Abnegation don't show skin. They all know that.

So it seems she will be taunted here as well.

She tosses it aside and stands on the ledge. She closes her eyes and focuses on her breathing.

" _Today_ , Initiate," Hux says, growing annoyed.

She jumps.

Her heart stops as she falls, it happens very fast and very slow. Her body drops, hitting against something hard that swings under her weight.

It nearly knocks the wind out of her.

Her hands instinctively grip onto whatever is supporting her; rope, she realizes.

_A net. There was a net._ Her worn muscles relax against it. She closes her eyes and lets out another laugh.

Until the net gets unexpectedly pulled to the right and she rolls, bracing herself so she doesn't fall off.

She meets warm brown eyes that belong to a man with two large hands on the edge of the net, tugging it down.

"Did you get pushed?" He asks, in a voice far deeper than anything she's heard.

"No," she answers. 

He doesn't say anything else, only grabs her by the arms and pulls her off the net as if she weighs nothing, steadying her on the ground.

She hopes her cheeks aren't red.

Or if they are, he'll blame the jump.

He lets go of her and Aurelia watches the first set of hands to ever touch her bare skin fall by his sides.

She looks up at him, all of him. He's very tall with a strong nose and full lips. His hair falls into waves. His eyes, warm and pretty. 

She's drawn to him instantly.

"What's your name?" He asks, staring directly at her.

"Aur—" she starts and then pauses. That was her name when she was factionless. Her name in Abnegation. Aurelia doesn't want to be either of those girls anymore.

"Think carefully. You only get to choose once," he says, not unkindly.

She looks away from him to think, finding him to be distracting.

"Rey," she settles on. "My name is Rey."

"First jumper— Rey!" He yells out and she hears the cheers from behind her. Suddenly aware they are not alone.

Her eyes go back to his only to find them still looking at her.

"Welcome to Dauntless," he says and she beams.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> I hope it was worth your time!


End file.
